10 Sisters, Widows, and Survivors: The Parallel Lives of Nancy and Ella Dudgeon

           

A vintage image representing sisters from the late 
19th century, much like Nancy and Ella Dudgeon.

     Paternal Great Grandmother: 

     Nancy Curtis Dudgeon and her sister 

     Missouri Ella Dudgeon

      52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks

      Week 10 - March 3, 2025

       Prompt: Siblings

Sisters, Widows, and Survivors: The Parallel Lives of Nancy and Ella

Family has a way of binding us together across time and circumstance. For Nancy Dudgeon Goldsmith and Ella Dudgeon Goldsmith, that bond was tested through love, loss, and resilience. These two sisters married two brothers—Nancy wed David Goldsmith in 1878, and Ella wed Carlton Goldsmith a year earlier in 1877. Their lives remained intertwined, even as they navigated widowhood, marital separation, hardship, and the ever-present support of family.

Nancy Dudgeon Goldsmith was my paternal great-grandmother, the mother of Gertrude Susan Goldsmith Wallis, mother of Ralph David Wallis, my father.

Early Years & Marriage

In 1875, the Goldsmith and Dudgeon families were both living in Chautauqua County, Kansas. It was here that Nancy and Ella met the Goldsmith brothers and began their lives as married women. For a time, life seemed full of promise—building families, settling into communities, and relying on each other as sisters often do. But fate had different plans.

Loss & Widowhood

Tragedy struck Ella first. In 1888, she lost her 14-month-old son, a heartbreak that no mother should have to bear. Just two years later, in 1890, her husband Carlton passed away, leaving her widowed with four children in Sedan, Kansas. Without a partner to provide, Ella had to make difficult choices. She eventually moved to Huntsville, Madison County, Arkansas, where her parents owned a farm. But stability remained elusive. By 1900, both parents had died and she was working as a laundress to support herself and two of her children, William and Ola. 

Nancy’s path unfolded differently. She and David Goldsmith remained together for many years, but by 1920, she was listed as a widow while living with her daughter Cynthia’s family in Bartlesville, Oklahoma. However, David was still alive—living separately with their son William in Morris, Oklahoma, where he died in 1924. Nancy continued moving between children’s homes as she aged, spending time with Cynthia in Bartlesville before living with William in Morris by 1930 and again with Cynthia in Tulsa, Oklahoma where she died in 1935. Cynthia herself was widowed at the young age of 48 in 1932, which may explain why Nancy was with her at the end of her life.

A Life of Work & Survival

While neither Nancy nor Ella had the luxury of financial security, Ella’s hardships were particularly stark. After her mother died in 1892, her father eventually moved in with her until his passing in 1899. By 1910, Ella was in Bartlesville, Oklahoma, working as a servant for a Swedish family. Ten years later, in 1920, she was no longer employed but was living with her son, James,  and an infant nephew. Despite their struggles, both sisters leaned on their children and extended family for support.

Generational Echoes: Ola’s Story

Ella’s daughter, Ola, would follow a heartbreakingly similar path to her mother. After Ella’s passing in 1924, Ola and her husband, Henry Cobb, moved into Ella’s home at 117 S Seminole in Bartlesville. Tragedy struck once again—Henry, a police officer, was shot and killed while investigating a domestic dispute, leaving Ola widowed with children still at home. To provide for her family, she worked as a janitress at a bank.

Like her mother, Ola endured immense personal loss. She buried not only an infant child but also an 8-year-old and a 14-year-old, echoing the grief her mother had faced decades earlier. Despite the sorrow, she remained steadfast, carrying forward the resilience her family had come to embody.

Family as a Lifeline

Although Nancy and Ella never lived together in their later years, they were always surrounded by family. In times of hardship, they turned to their children, and parents —an enduring testament to the strength of familial bonds. Their legacy of resilience continued into the next generation. In 1945, when Nancy’s grandson—my father—was working in Bartlesville just before his marriage, Ola made sure he had home-cooked meals. Even through hardship, family looked after one another.

The story of Nancy and Ella is not just one of survival but of connection. They faced loss but were never truly alone. The ties that bound them in life continued through the generations, proving that family, above all, is the foundation upon which we endure.